This is my Blog, on it I simply write stuff that I feel like writing about. You'll find it heavily slanted towards tech, games, entertainment and the like. I write about other stuff too, and somethings I write about things. I also do photography, the link is on your right.

Tuesday, 31 July 2012


I would like to start this post with a quote from one of the most profoundly deep and inspirational characters of our time:

Ho ho ho Hooooooooooooo! Fiction can be fun, but I find the reference section a little more enlightening.

-Ace Ventura

It's no secret that I have be known to indulge in a book or ten.  There's no telling what kind of excitement and adventure you are in for when you crack the cover of a new book.  No telling what kind of crazy characters you will be introduced to, or get re-acquainted with.  However, I must say that it doesn't always have to be make believe to be fun.  I find there is all kinds of entertainment to be had in non-fiction books, you just have to look a little bit harder.  You just may learn something along the way as well.
That being said, I though I'd share some of my favourite non-fiction works that are just plain fun to read:


Those are just a few of the many if have enjoyed.
Know anymore I should look into?  Let’s know in the comments!


Friday, 27 July 2012

In late 2008, something happened...I had just turned a relativly large corner in my life, Things started to get a little bit wonky in my brain.  These wonkinesses seemed to manifest themselves in the form of...let's day "odd" facebook updates.  I present to you dear reader, for your scrutiny and enjoyment, the great facebook madness.  All the entries you are about to see are 100% real and unedited, veiwer discretion is advised.

Jeremy Melchior is BATMAN!!
October 16, 2008 at 15:28

Jeremy Melchior has shot the food
October 20, 2008 at 17:41

Just a few blips on the radar, nothing to out of the ordinary for me anyway, but then a month later:  

Jeremy Melchior thinks that cyclops he met the other day was winking at him
November 20, 2008 at 20:04

Jeremy Melchior is on to all of you. Robots! Every last one of you! With your gears, and your clanking around and whatnot. Don't think I don't know.
November 26, 2008 at 12:52

Jeremy Melchior thinks mammoths are assholes.
December 2, 2008 at 23:08

Jeremy Melchior just realized the the correct answer to any mathematical equation is a whale. This changes everything!
December 18, 2008 at 17:38

Jeremy Melchior thinks finkle and Einhorn are in it together, but how? and why?
December 31, 2008 at 18:51

Why would that be my last posr of the year? Clearly I had important business on my mind.

Jeremy Melchior si gnikaeps ni edoc
January 6, 2009 at 12:53

Jeremy Melchior is a secret society, all by himself, no you can't join
January 10, 2009 at 18:54

Jeremy Melchior is oogaboogabooga!!!!!
January 31, 2009 at 18:11

Jeremy Melchior wants you to touch his awesome button....touch it.
April 5, 2009 at 16:34

Jeremy Melchior is a hooker with a heart of gold.
April 24, 2009 at 16:06

Then things really start to do south on me:

Jeremy Melchior is beginning to think that a golden retriever can't drive a car at all. So much for my brilliant plan. It's ok, plan B. All i need is a cookie sheet, a carburetor from a 85 tempo, a roll of duct tape and a live chicken.
May 3, 2009 at 12:16

Jeremy Melchior If you were driving down the highway, and you met yourself going the other way, do you wave? And do you wave back at yourself?
May 11, 2009 at 11:08

Jeremy Melchior you pick up a camera, and browse the photos on it. It contains pictures of you, standing exactly where you are right now, looking at the photos on a camera.
May 13, 2009 at 16:19

Jeremy Melchior I bought a CD the other day, it had no music on it, just a recording of me arguing with somebody. I went to return it the next day, as I argued with the clerk about wanting to return it, I realized that's what was on the CD.
May 22, 2009 at 23:54

Jeremy Melchior I would like to go one day back in time, I'd kill my past self and take his place, nobody would be the wiser. Even better, I could wait until the next day, go back in time again, 1 minute after I killed myself, and kill my other self. Repeat as needed f
May 23, 2009 at 17:39

Jeremy Melchior Now that I know about time travel, I decided to play a little joke on myself. I went back in time and secretly recorded an argument between my past self and store clerk about returning a CD, I then went a little farther back in time and planted the recor
May 24, 2009 at 21:56

This message is cut off for some reason, but you get the idea.

Jeremy Melchior I think there is something wrong with my bathroom mirror. This morning when I got up and stood in front of it, all I could see was the back of my head, my reflection was facing the same was as me.
May 26, 2009 at 18:07

Jeremy Melchior I had trouble getting out of the house this morning. The front door just lead back into the house for some reason. I tried the bathroom door, but that just lead to the storage closet. The linen closet door lead to the bedroom. Finally I just crawled out the window.
May 31, 2009 at 18:01

Jeremy Melchior This morning when I got up, the shower was spraying orange juice, the towel racks had pancakes instead of towels, the soap bar was bacon, and there was cereal in the toilet bowl, I thought to myself, "It's gonna be a breakfasty kind of day."
June 2, 2009 at 19:22

Jeremy Melchior is currently sleeping. Which begs two questions. 1) how the hell did i write this? and 2)Where the hell are my pants?
June 4, 2009 at 21:33

Jeremy Melchior the sun was being a dick this morning. It started to rise as per usual, but then it ducked back down behind the horizon. I know it was there, I could hear it giggling to itself
June 9, 2009 at 19:19

Jeremy Melchior The other day I was wandering through the forest when a bear jumped out from behind a tree. I slowly backed away, knowing you're not suppose to run. To my surprise he said, "spare some change?" "What would a bear need change for?" I asked. "For the bus" I gave him some, but I knew he was going to spend it on booze.
June 15, 2009 at 16:38

Jeremy Melchior just realized that he's been speed-walking everywhere in slow motion.
June 16, 2009 at 22:58

Jeremy Melchior when I was young I had an imaginary friend that was a zombie named Gary. I didn't realize he wasn't actually imaginary until one day I came home from school and he had eaten our neighbors, the Hendersons. We had to move.
June 26, 2009 at 21:52

Jeremy Melchior isn't Jeremy
June 29, 2009 at 19:37

That is a little troubling...

Jeremy Melchior Last night I was asleep and dreaming that I was asleep and dreaming that I was asleep and dreaming that I was asleep and dreaming that I was awake, which I was.
July 5, 2009 at 8:29

Jeremy Melchior I remember the last time a traveled by bus. Halfway through the trip, we were boarded by pirates. They plundered all of our booty and scuttled us. There wasn't really a plank anywhere to make us walk, so they just made us walk to the next town.
July 6, 2009 at 13:39

Jeremy Melchior was attacked by an axe murderer the other day. He was wielding a machete . When he swung at me much to my surprise (and his) the blade bounced right off. Turns out axe murderers can only use axes. Who knew?
July 21, 2009 at 16:46

Jeremy Melchior I'll never forget the day my twin met his evil twin brother. I tell you, where would the world be without hastily dug shallow graves?
July 29, 2009 at 17:41

Jeremy Melchior was eaten by a yeti.
August 11, 2009 at 21:47

Jeremy Melchior was regurgitated by a yeti.
August 12, 2009 at 19:39

Jeremy Melchior is best friends with a yeti.
August 13, 2009 at 18:35

Jeremy Melchior just found out a yeti has been spreading all kinds of awful rumours about me, what a jerk.
August 14, 2009 at 18:30

Jeremy Melchior Blacked out. When I woke up, I was covered in Yeti blood and fur. I guess this ends the saga of the yeti.
August 15, 2009 at 17:44

Jeremy Melchior was eaten by an abominable snowman. Just kidding, they don't exist.
August 16, 2009 at 10:17

Jeremy Melchior I've been writing the same thing on this update for 3 weeks now. Tomorrow, I'll start again, the same thing, but none of you will remember.
August 16, 2009 at 22:22

Jeremy Melchior I've been writing the same thing on this update for 3 weeks now. Tomorrow, I'll start again, the same thing, but none of you will remember.
August 17, 2009 at 17:35

Jeremy Melchior has not had a single problem with a yeti so far today. I've been yeti free for days now. Yeti.
August 18, 2009 at 16:15

I really don't know what's with the yeti...

Jeremy Melchior I was sitting at the computer the other day, and a fuzzy black thing fell from the ceiling. As I looked up, more of them started to fall. Soon it was falling like snow. Its smelled like ashes. It started getting very hot, the wall were turning red. Then I started to hear wailing and screaming. I tell you, living next door to a volcano with a roller coaster over it sucks.
August 21, 2009 at 18:01

Jeremy Melchior I was about to get into my car this morning to drive to work when I noticed a very large bee had become trapped in there. I asked him politely if he would leave, but apparently he didn't want to. I said fine, but I have to get to work. He told me he would leave my car if I let him drive. Turns out, bees can drive a stick shift like a motherfucker.
September 10, 2009 at 18:27

Jeremy Melchior woke up this morning 10 minutes behind reality. Very odd, no people, no sounds, nothing. Everyone and everything was ten minutes in the future. All that was left was the empty shell of the past. Damn inconvenient, my present self took my car to work, I had to walk all the way there. He ate my breakfast too.
September 17, 2009 at 20:18

Jeremy Melchior I wish I was the inventor of bacon. Then people would be like, "hey, what's up?" I'd be all like, "not much, just invented bacon." They'd be like, "awesome!" Then I'd be like, "I know!"
September 24, 2009 at 17:30

Jeremy Melchior One time I got hopelessly lost in the amazonian rain forest. Days and days I wandered, i got to the end of my rope, my feet were swollen, I was covered in bug bites, I was sick with god knows what. I'm my delirium, I asked a monkey for directions to the nearest town, turns out he had a car. He drove me out, all I had to do was pay for gas.
September 26, 2009 at 21:29

Jeremy Melchior was driving down the road tonight, when the clouds above me suddenly got dark and foreboding.They swirled around,the wind picked up.A funnel cloud raced down from the sky,with a flash of lighting,a figure appeared on the road ahead of me.He was astride a mighty steed,30ft tall or more.His fiery eyes drilled into my soul.He pointed at me."Jeremy," he said with a voice like booming thunder,"your cell bill is overdue!"
October 20, 2009 at 20:11

Jeremy Melchior the other morning I was getting ready for my day.Got cleaned up,put some clothes on,and walked into the living room.Then I realized that I had no clothes on.Funny I could have sworn I just did that.No matter,back to the bedroom,put on some clothes.Got to the kitchen,I have no clothes on.It happened about a dozen times before I could finally leave the house.
November 6, 2009 at 11:36

Jeremy Melchior you know in movies when they go to an insane asylum and there's always that one inmate that they keep permanently eff'ed up so all they do is drool on themselves and stare at the wall? Yeah, I want that.
November 11, 2009 at 0:02

I think this is about when I started to realize how wierd things had gotten.

Jeremy Melchior has discovered that the difference between a duck is mile and a quarter of blue water vapor. Wrapped up in a broken hair style of bacon encrusted happy pants. The co-processor of this happenstance is the root of lemon boozed carp. Sky shoes in the dark horse trap are bungled zippers.
November 14, 2009 at 13:34

...but I couldn't seem to stop

Jeremy Melchior is scratatonically frumpdillious
December 4, 2009 at 0:29

Jeremy Melchior i see his beady little eyes everywhere i go. this is the perfect time for a yeti to be stalking me, with the snow and all. I'm no fool though, i know he's out there, watching, waiting...i'll be ready.
December 6, 2009 at 21:47

Jeremy Melchior had a dream last night that a vampire was stalking me and trying to turn me to evil. When she caught me she said, "life is the only thing worth dying for." I woke up and I was like, "did I just blow my own mind? In my sleep?" A quick Google search and turns out it's some crappy movie that nobody has heard of that came out in 2004.

Jeremy Melchior If 2009 was a villain in a movie, today would be like when you thought the villain was FINALLY dead, but it come back one more time to try and kill you. Eff you 09.

Interesting, interesting indeed....

Jeremy Melchior Yesterday, when I got to work, the parking lot was already full, everything except cars. Horse and buggies, rickshaws, go-karts, the odd airplane. Finally I found a space, just before I pulled in, a cow, suspended by a balloon, swooped in and stole it from me. Just as I suspected, cows are parking spot stealers.
January 4, 2010 at 12:51

Jeremy Melchior On the way home tonight I followed a single cab pickup most of the way. We stopped at a red light. The man in the truck slowly started to turn his head to the right, it kept turning and turning until he was facing me directly. He had a creepy grin on his face. The light turned green and he drove off, still facing me.
January 6, 2010 at 19:24

Jeremy Melchior sometimes I Push the listen button on my apartments intercom just to see if there is anyone standing at the front door, talking about me, and plotting.
March 12, 2010 at 0:04

Notice the dates, the crazy updates are getting farther apart

Jeremy Melchior if you find yourself lost in the wilderness, and you hear what appears to be human laughter, common knowledge is that it is a Canadian loon. As their call can sound like laughter. However, this is false, it's actually tree spirits, and they are coming to kill you.
March 15, 2010 at 8:32

Jeremy Melchior I have absolutely nothing funny, creative, insightful, goofy, weird, odd, offbeat, insane, intelligent, rude, clever, or stupid to say. I must be slipping.
April 25, 2010 at 22:14

I think the worst of it is almost over.

Jeremy Melchior to who ever signed an organ donor card, and by that action created a small miracle for my mom, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
May 24, 2010 at 23:54

This was an important day, fun fact, this comment holds my person record fo the amount of "likes" it got.

Jeremy Melchior today I was walking through the parking lot on my lunch break, when I saw a little green blob of goo on the ground, about the size of a football. It had 2 beady little eyeballs on stalks. When it saw me it started making a little warbling noise and began to follow me. It made a little slurpy sucking noise as it moved. I guess it thought I was it's mother or something. I know, odd indeed.
June 22, 2010 at 18:09

The occasional relapse

Jeremy Melchior Does it bother anybody else that you will never, ever see your own face? Reflections, images, drawings of it yes, but never your actual face.
September 29, 2010 at 13:21

There are the occasional spattering of lunacy from here on out, all the way up to the present day, but it's all very standard by my brains measurment.  Nothing that's been quite so ferociously and vigourously abundant as it is was in 2009 and 2010.  So if oyu met me in 2009 or 2010, I apologize, you met me a a very strange time in my life.  Cue the pixies.  "where is my mind?"


Wednesday, 18 July 2012


I was up very late last night because I couldn't sleep.  Usually when I can't sleep it's because my brain won't shut the fuck up.  So I was sitting there in the dark, and I started thinking about the dark itself.  I think a lot of people find night time and darkness to be unsettling.  Possibly a vestigial emotion from when we were kids. In children, it's not considered to be a phobia, its normal, unless it persists into adulthood.  They call that nyctophobia.  Like any other phobia, it's an intense irrational fear response to an object or situation that poses little or no threat.  As far as darkness goes, I most definitely do not have a phobia of it.  I actually kind of like it.  Don't worry, I'm not going to start spouting bad goth poetry.  My life is not a deep spiraling pit of darkness and despair, crying blood drops instead of tears.  It just makes me feel comfortable, and safe.
So I got to thinking, is there an opposite to a phobia?  I was thinking maybe I had anti-nyctophobia or something like that.  Well, I don't know why, but it took me quite a bit of googling to figure it out, maybe because it was 3 in the morning.  At any rate, the opposite of a phobia is, as near as I can tell, a philia.  As made famous by the word necrophilia, and other such unpleasantries.  A philia is described as "love of or obsession" with something.  So in my case I would have nyctophilia?  That just sounds a little unpleasnt, and possibly contagious.  Also, I'm not obsessed with dark or night time, I just enjoy it's company.  One could say I love night, but I'm not IN love with night.  I'm sorry night, it's not you it's me.

So, as my mind often does, I found it wandering around the internet, dazed, confused and really tired, but still I couldn't sleep.  So I stared reading about phobias...man is there ever some fucked up people out there!  There is quite literally a phobia (and consequentially a philia, and a mania) for absolutely everything!

Here are some of my favorites:

Sesquipedalophobia- Fear of long words. (really? should that be such a long word?)
Sinistrophobia- Fear of things to the left or left-handed. (I'm left handed, I guess I'm the boogie man)
Teutophobia- Fear of German or German things (to be fair, they are scary)
Theophobia- Fear of gods or religion (smart move)
Anablephobia- Fear of looking up (maybe dogs CAN look up, they're just afraid)
Epistemophobia- Fear of knowledge (you know someone like this, don't you?)
Kyphophobia- Fear of stooping. (dafuq?)
Novercaphobia- Fear of your step-mother. (lol)
Phronemophobia- Fear of thinking (bu-wah?)
and my personal favorite:
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia- Fear of the number 666.

Also, here are some fan favorites, how many do you have? (these are the 10 most common)

1)Acrophobia - fear of hieghts
2)Claustrophobia - fear of enclosed spaces
3)Ophidiophobia- fear of snakes
4)Arachnophobia - Fear of Spiders
5)Trypanophobia - Fear of Injection or Medical Needles
6)Astraphobia - Fear of Thunder and Lightning
7)Mysophobia AKA Germophobia - Fear of Germs
8)Nyctophobia - Fear of the Dark
9)i don't feel like
10)adding 2 more


Sunday, 15 July 2012


So, I've been playing this new MMORPG call The Secret world.  I know, I know, I can already here the collective groans of "oh great, yet another WoW ripoff.  All these MMO's are all the same, cookie cutter, stale game play."
Well, I'm here to tell you Funcom actually did a really good job breaking the mould, and here's why:

The first, and in my opinion greatest difference is the player advancement.  There is no set linear advancement like traditional MMO's.  There is no levels, and you can't "grind" your way to success.  All the advancement is more of a lateral advancement.  You can grow your character's skill set in may different directions, but the skills don't necessarily get better, just more varied.  The deciding factor of your success depends much more on proper skill selection, and knowing how to use them, then on shear force.  Combat is much more about strategy, movement, positioning, and timing, then any other MMO I've played.

Essentially, to build up you character, you earn Anima Points (AP) and skill points (SP) by questing and killing stuff, much like any MMO.  The difference is, these points are essentially limitless, as there are no levels, there are no caps.  You then spend those points to buy abilities and such.  You could could in theory get every skill in the game if you play long enough.  There's no need to make an alt.  The key here is, you can only used 7 active abilities at a time, and 7 passive ones, so choose wisely.  There are 3 ability categories, each with 3 sub-categories.  Guns, melee, and magic.  Under guns you have pistols, shotguns, and assault rifles.  Under melee, you have swords claws and hammers.  Under magic you have chaos, blood, and elemental.  Use them to make whatever the hell kind of character you wish.

Questing has also gotten a huge face lift.  The quests are dividing into types of quests.  Story line, main, dungeon, and side quests.   Story line quests are the over all story of the area you are playing in, it's a huge quest usually with many stages, the first one has 18 stages.  Dungeon quests are simply quests involving a dungeon, you can only have one of these are a time.  Side quests are usually fairly simple tasks with only a few steps, fetch, kill, investigate, that sort of thing, you can have 3 at once.
Main quests are really the bread and butter of the game.  They are usually quite a bit more involved, and add a lots back story and color to the areas.  There are several types of main quests.  Standard ones are usually straight forward but riddled with story telling and character interaction.  There is tons of detail put into these quests.  There is also stealth quests, usually leading to solo instances where you have to find a way to sneak past defenses, requires a bit of problem solving.  The finally type of quest is called an investigation type.  This is where shit gets real!  These quests give you virtually nothing to go on, no map markings or hints, and often you need to look outside the game to solve them.  There is one quest that has you translating latin, researching famous painters, looking up verses in the bible, and cracking codes.  All of this is not in game, I actually had to use google translate, and find the bible verse online.  These really make you think outside the box, and some are very complex.  No hand holding here kids.

 Over all, I really think this a fresh take on the genre, and I'm having a blast playing it.  However, this game with never make it big, for several reasons.  First off, it's a very adult game.  It's most defiantly earned it's "M" rating.  Gore, violence, language, sex, it's got it all!  I think it's great, but that really hurts it's mass market appeal.  Secondly is the difficulty, it's absolutely, unforgivingly, brutal.  The chat is just riddled with people who have migrated over from other MMO's constantly bitching about not understanding this quest or that thing.  People claiming things are broken because they couldn't figure it out in 10 seconds or less.  It's not for the faint of heart, but if you are looking for something to challenge your brain, with a rich, moody horror story  like atmosphere, then you will love this.

Just beware of the black house.  I stumbled upon it while I was wandering around.  I tried to walk in the front door, but a force threw me back out.  I decided to try the back door, I got in, but the wall were bleeding, there was voices whispering horrible things in my head, my vision got blurry, and I started to loose health.  I barely stumbled back out with my life.
Expect to find that, and thousand more equally creepy yet delightful environments in this game.

I give this game, 4.5 vile, screaming, hellspawned, monsters from beyond out of 5.


Wednesday, 4 July 2012

It's been quite some time since I posted anything.  Well, sometimes life throws a lot of shit at you all at once, and you have to figure out how to deal with it.  At the end of June I lost my job.  Right after that I was diagnosed with asthma, turns out I've had it my whole life and didn't even know it.  I always just thought I got winded easily, or that I was simply out of shape and needed to exercise more.  It's gotten worse as I'm getting older.  In my younger days I would just power through it and ignore the fact that I couldn't catch my breath.  Such is the advantage of youth I suppose.  In the more recent days, (last 10 years or so) I would simply blame myself for being lazy, not exercising enough, being weak, or worthless.  Such is the mindset of someone suffering from severe depression.

Now, when I started this blog, I had only one rule.  I would write for me, unflinchingly, unapologetically me.  I write to entertain myself, and if someone else is entertained in the process, then that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.  I think this the only way to keep things honest.  Sometimes I write simply because it is cathartic, and this is one of those times.  I understand if you don't read any further than this.

In late 1998, I was fired from my dream job.  It was the job I was meant to do in this life, it's what I was built for.  I was fired (technically laid off, but who are we fooling?), and it destroyed my soul.  I don't mean to be mellow dramatic, but I need to stress that this event was to be a major turning point in my life, to the point that I actually identify my life as taking place in two parts, everything before, and everything after.
I didn't pursue this career after this happened, maybe I should have, but you know what they say about hindsight.  Instead I just kind of wallowed around, doing odd computer related jobs, not really having any direction or goals.  In mid 2000, (remember the Y2K scare? ahhh good times) I started see spots in my vision, broke out in hives, started having weird chest pains (asthma?), dizzy spells.  Then I had a complete emotional meltdown.  I was really worried, and went to see a my doctor.  After a battery of tests, (we never tested my lung capacity) she informed me that I was suffering from severe depression, and I needed to get help.  She insisted that I take sick leave from my job, and start on some medication to try to get me levelled out.  I was flat broke and had no health coverage.  I couldn't afford the medication.  Not only that, I was young and foolish, I didn't believe in "depression."  Such a bullshit concept.  If you are feeling depressed, you just need to suck it up, stop being a little bitch, and get on with it.

Fast forward 11 years.  I've left a trail of sorrow and destruction in my wake as I stumble aimlessly through life.  My tattered life in shambles.  I've done more damage to myself than I ever thought I could, not to mention the collateral damage I have likely done to all the people that have come in and out of my life in those last 11 years.  You have no idea how sorry I am for that.  I was in ruin, heath wise, financially, emotionally.  No education, suicidal.  Getting very close to the edge.  I guess I didn't "get on with it" very well.

Then I was saved, by of all things, a comic I read on the Internet, I don't even know who made it.

This is it.

I read this comic and broke down completely.  It forced me to realize something.  Depression is a very real, and very serious thing.  This is important.  Only now that I've crawled out of my rut did I realize how deep it really was.  I feel lucky though in some ways, so often people go their entire lives with out getting various mental illness diagnosed.  It seems it is not prioritized like any regular physical illness, and not diagnosed or treated.  Contrast that with asthma for example.  There is a very simple test to determine if you have it, and a very well know treatment, who doesn't know what an asthma puffer is?  Mental illness?  No definitive tests, no definitive treatments.  To the point that some people, me included at the time, don't even think they are a real thing.

So in November of 2011, I went to see a doctor.  We started a treatment.  I'm OK now, I'm really OK.  I have asthma, I lost my job, my kidneys are a mess, but I now have the strength to deal with it.  Also, there are all kinds of really good things in my life, they lend me any extra strength I need.

There's no need to carefully hide my pain from everybody anymore, a skill that I became exceedingly good at.  There's none there to hide.  I have apologized to myself, and I even forgave myself.  On top of all that, I recently took my very first full lung full of air in my entire life, and it was awesome!  I suppose even a respiratory disease can have it's upside.

I guess all I'm really trying to say is:  I fucking LOVE oxygen!